Monday, March 11, 2013

Discipline: Questions, not Answers

I’ll happily admit that Yarrow is an easy child, she’s sweet, loving, and kind. She likes to nestle her toys close to her heart..actually, she’s been seen nestling everything from toys to beer bottles to Luba’s unwilling head close to her heart. And those she can’t physically nestle, like the moon, or the statue of St. Patrick in the church, she nestles symbolically ~ reaching for them and hugging her hands close again with her eyes on the object of her love. She helps out eagerly ~ the dog is thrilled to have someone who actually enjoys playing with dog food feeding her, and I’m constantly encouraging Yarrow to “sweep toward the dust pan” and to roll the dough gently.. Apart from a consistent refusal to sleep like a person, she’s just a little love. But she’s also a wretch in her own right at times, and these days we’ve been dealing with a little tendency to hit out with her tiny hands when we displease her (or when she’s especially excited). It’s not idea at all, though the look of absolute horror on her face when one angry hand actually makes contact is adorable. Generally, we sit her down somewhere, tell her firmly that hitting is not nice at all and make her sit, ignored for a while, until she’s calm, when we talk again and make certain, she in some way acknowledges her offense and promising to be kind in the future. Hitting does seem to be diminishing, but I’m wondering, are there better ideas out there?

I’d love to hear: how do you discipline your children? I’d love advice and encouragement from other mother’s as Petka’s little person-hood asserts itself more and more!


  1. It's so awing to watch a personality evolve out of the little human being you carried for ten months, isn't it?

    I'm having my reservations, as you have. It doesn't make sense to punish Afon for hitting and throwing with spankings. On the other hand, in a public setting, we need an immediate correction, and saying 'You're getting time out when we get home' makes me doubt the effectiveness of that route.

  2. It is Amazing!

    We're lucky, in that Yarrow is generally not going to hit in public ~ she's very much aware of strangers' eyes..but when she does we try to take her out of the crowd (again with the strangers' eyes) and take her little face in our hands to speak the correction, which is ok effective-wise, but she's very sensitive to corrections - emotionally anyway, so that kind of helps..if Afon isn't as weak-skinned, I don't know how effective it'd be.

  3. Masha - I am Christie's friend that lives in Alaska. I have two little boys - one Afon's age (two weeks older) and a one year old. I have a friend that has told me that little boys are harder to discipline than little girls. Oliver is a very head strong little man, but very sensitive. Lately even telling him "NO" sternly will end with a pout face and tears. I think parenting style has a lot to do with the child. I say this because I have two little people to deal with and they are both VERY different and I am sure the way I deal with their respective discipline will be as unique as the child.