Today

Feeling..tired and crabby. Luba has been crabbing around the house all day, curling up on the couch, trying to sneak onto the bed, stealing Yarrow's bread with honey..while Yarrow's been getting oatmeal in my hair (how? Why?), pushing computer buttons while I type, and eating unnatural amounts of oatmeal. I'm on my third pot of tea, trying to forget the package of smoked salmon in the freezer and the reasonably good foccacia in the cabinet. Instead, I'm purging. The 40 bags in 40 days challenge is sort of a fun side project this Lent. We want to pare down our possessions, and Lent is such an ideal time for it - but I can't get rid of books..the books I don't read much, don't love, or love too much and need to wean myself from are moved to the outhouse - where they're easily accessible, but not too easily accessible..

Seeing..Yarrow's defiant little butt in the air. She's crabbed her way into a nap (napping is really only essential on her rough days..and today is one of them. Probably in part because it's one of my rough days too..but she's definitely pushing a lot of boundaries recently. And 'napping' (really just enforced time in her bed) is usually the easiest way to handle it. If anyone has another idea, I'm open to it!

 Smelling.. my tea has no real scent..it's a fasting tea, designed to help balance the body during a fast, and it really does help. So does fennel, but there's no fennel in this tea.  I don't really smell anything right now, not the tea, not the firewood, not the grapefruit and lavender essential oils I put into the laundry soap, nothing. It feels sort of empty.

Tasting..Fasting tea. What does it taste like? Medicinal..sort of; very 'herbal', very bland and balancing and quiet. 

 Listening.. to Luba scratch at the door, whining and barking..I won't let her in yet, she's been awful, and it's actually pretty warm out; and to Yarrow, singing her defiance song: "Eeeeeh, Eenh, this is my KINGDOM COME, this is my KINGDOM COME.." (she steals shamelessly from her radio favorites)

 Grateful... for a warming trend (I hope!!!!!!), and for some time to myself tonight to restore my peace.
 
Reading..Simcha Fisher's Sinner's Guide to Natural Family Planning..I'm not a fan, should I review books I don't like at all? I wouldn't think twice about it if I weren't biased against if from the start..I think I'm going to try within the next week, in the kindest way possible.

Loving..The whole season of Lent! Ash Wednesday aside, It's been a wonderful start. I went to confession Saturday, cleaned out the car, and felt indulgent eating fish at night; I've been less and less tempted to over-do it in cups of coffee without my amazing cream, and haven't been ignoring possibly problematic labels (did you know the grocery-store 'sushi' has egg in it!!!?? I was devastated.)

 Hoping..the good Fast lasts..the snow melts..The Fast is fruitful..
 
Working on..balance.