Quotidian Notes: Promised Warmth and Rebounding

I'm still recovering from the 7 days of blogging we did last week..as well as recovering from a return to normal schedule this week - I miss vacation! I miss having Seth home all day. Our goal for next winter is to actually take the whole winter off: Christmas through March. I'm determined to do it right this year.

Yarrow's Altar

It's 9 am and I'm only on my second cup of coffee - I consider that a win! But the Fast didn't begin well for me this year at all..Wednesday was not the delightfully focused and holy day I'd hoped for (all my own fault, really). I started back on focused Lent yesterday. Not with perfection, but with all the right steps. The house was clean, the altar refreshed, Yarrow and I started our Lenten Prayer time together, and I began to feel connected to the fast. I think it'll be a good season after all..a hard season - I've been too indulgent for too long; but a good and holy season, focused on love. 

It is a retreat season for me. A quiet time of reflection. But reflection and quite are a little too indulgent for me this season - so as I focus on love this Lent, I'll also be focusing on reaching out more to those I love. It would be so easy for me to stay tucked away with Seth and Yarrow and Luba..writing to dear friends occasionally and forgetting the world around me. But I'm to be in the world, unfortunately, and that calls me to reach out. So I'm searching for a balance. A way to live this worldly monasticism I need - avoid creating the hermitage I crave and step out sometimes. So we'll be writing more letters, Yarrow and I; walking down the road when the weather allows it; calling family and those poor, neglected friends of mine; and working into our prayer time a special time for her best-loved friends. We have a rock on her tiny altar from my sister and her husband. Yarrow loves it - she holds it and we pray for Ciocia Laura and Wujek Charles - we nestle their rock between Christ and His Mother, light a candle, and let them rest in Love.

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The Virgin is primary this Lent. I've devoted my year to her, and still I'm surprised at how she infuses herself. I've moved the family Icon to a more primary place on the altar. Today Petka and I will write out paper prayers to tuck around her like tiny birds. I'd love to add your intentions, if you'd like to share them. 

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I've finished my second cup - it's sort of devastating. I'm trying to keep to two cups a day. It's time to switch back to tea. I started the day with a small pot of Tulsi tea..holy basil..it is supposed to be energizing. Coffee is energizing. Tulsi is very nice though. Very fresh.

Is is wrong that I was thrilled to discover my Raw Jersey Cream would be unavailable throughout Lent (it's the slow season at the farm). No one can have it. I'm feeling impiously smug about the forced lenten fast for all Raw Cream addicts. I know it's wrong, but I am glad.

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Today is a fasting day. We've had oatmeal with honey, pumpkin seeds, flax seed, and dried apricots - it's decadent for a fast day, but it has to last until supper. I fill up on tea instead - shooting covetous glances at the pot of soup from last night: Red lentils and curry, coconut milk, cinnamon, garlic. Na'an without oil so Seth can take it for lunch today. Rhythm is a gift. I'm more aware of the time. I know the day: Fridays belong to Paraskeva. We will leave her the small na'an Yarrow rolled out last night - lumpy and hard, but full of confident love.

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My Lenten series on Modesty begins this Tuesday! I'm really looking forward to absorbing the wisdom of the women around, opening up conversations, and growing together. Thanks for joining me in it!