Feeling Pretty

At Everything to Someone, earlier this month, my friend Christie wrote a bit about liking the way you look. 

I think she looks adorable..all vintage and hipster-y. It's not my look, but some days I wish it was.

Most days though, I love my look. I'm not sure what it is anymore, but I like it. 

I like my skirts heavy, long, and textured..I like black eye-liner and big earrings, I like my body well enough to pick clothes that flatter rather than conceal. And I like to play with my 'look'. 

I want my children to feel confident playing with fashion: I want them to step outside the narrow confines of societies ideals and delight in clothing that fits them. Boys are especially limited in our culture - why is the only acceptable formal-wear for boys and men in our society a suit. Boring! 

I'd like my son to be able to feel confident and masculine in a skirt (some men look awesome in a skirt, really, I've met them! Generally they have a lot of tattoos.); I'd like my daughter to feel confident and feminine in coveralls (she wants to be a mechanic), I'd like them bother to feel confident and beautiful in Indian silks..because really, who doesn't? And I'd like them both to feel confident and beautiful naked. Because they are. 

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I love make-up. I love dressing up my eyes. Yarrow loves make-up as well..she piles it on. She's good at doing her lips, I'm not. But make-up looks best when it's used to flatter, not conceal or alter. I'm uncomfortable with the excessive contouring that some people do.

Maybe that's just because I like my face. I like it in the early morning, without make-up.

And I like it in the later morning, with make-up.

..and now I want bangs again. I might even want to be a blond again...

Someday.

I dress and do my make-up for myself, my husband, and my children. I want to feel pretty. I want my husband to smile when he sees me, and I want my children to think their mother is beautiful. I want my children to know that motherhood doesn't mean bad hair and lazy dressing; that it can inspire women to love their bodies more than ever, not because they've 'sacrificed their bodies having children' but because they've met their bodies in a deep, rich way, and become someone new. 

Pretty - Happy - Funny - Real

Pretty

[a detail from Ilya's baptismal gown; last Saturday's breakfast-in-the-making; my husband's beautiful new tattoo]

I've been feeling overwhelmed by my own good-fortune recently. Looking around at my life and delighting in it again and again. Spring has come, and it feels like summer.

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Happy

[The only baptism photo we ended up getting; Yarrow in her new sweater, old Easter dress, and my heels; siblings]

Ilya is happiest with Yarrow around. His baptism was almost two months ago (we don't like delaying sacraments) but I never got any photos, so this is all we've got from the actual event.

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Funny

[kids and dog; she stole the cowboy boots..and my attitude; feeling big]

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Real

[sleeping baby; early morning (I slept in my make-up again); altar-card]

Blessed Friday, all!

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Linking up with Like Mother, Like Daughter

Make-up Philosophy

and yup..those are my roots showing through.

During Lent, my dear friend Christie shared her Philosophy of Make-up on Everything to Someone..and it got me wondering: do I have a philosophy of make-up? She writes that make-up ideally

"improved my appearance, and it didn't look like I wasn't wearing any makeup, but it didn't look like my makeup was hiding me either."

 Which is a lovely description..I like to look like I'm wearing make-up. I like dramatic eyes and the chance to play with my 'look'. I like to 'decorate' as much as 'beautify' myself with make-up and emphasize my eyes as much as possible.

"Makeup serves two main purposes: (1) to decorate and (2) to beautify.  These purposes don't have to be mutually exclusive, but I think when the decorating takes away from, distracts, or frustrates one's God-given beauty, it's a shame."

 Again, I think Christie makes a great distinction..and it's one I try to make each day as I apply it to my eyes and face..I want to decorate while beautifying, nurture the good, subdue the weathered aspects of my skin, and play.

If I didn't have to take Seth's opinion into account, 90% of my wardrobe and make-up would be black...A few colorful silk skirts, neglected lips, and black blackness everywhere else! 

As it is, even with my dear, neglected husband pulling for variety, I'm hovering somewhere around 75% black in my overall 'look'. And when I start searching for something new, I find myself inevitably in the black racks. 

With make-up I am, despite a philosophy that leans toward playing, equally monotonous. The lazy me has long ago discovered that I like my eyes wide and dark, emphasized with black and grey; my skin blush-less (I blush too easily on my own!); and my lips..well, I like my lips done in dark purples or brownish reds, but I long for the style to pull off a really red red, and I generally neglect my lips entirely - knowing the color will end up long gone before noon anyway.

I'm working on that,  because it violates my philosophy of make-up..the philosophy that says: Be pretty today, for tomorrow we're all wrinkly and old..and be pretty then too, because only Buffy gets to be dead, but still pretty, so live it up!


Do you use make-up? What's your philosophy of looking good? 

Wardrobe Adjustments: Being Pretty

My look needs a bit of an update. In general, I like the theme I'm going for, sort of 'just off the boat' old-worldy, mixed with bohemian..but in practice, I tend to look more like what I am: 'lazy homesteader'. So I'm re-doing my wardrobe, starting today. The intentional look stays the same, and everything that doesn't fit, goes. So, here are the principals:

• Toss everything I'm only partially thrilled with (n.b. 'tossed' can mean either 'cut up and reuse' or 'donate' .. if the fabric is worth saving, I'll throw it in the sewing pile).

• Have 'work' clothes, 'good' clothes, and 'better' clothes..and don't clean the chicken coop in anything but work clothes!!

• Don't buy anything halfheartedly. It has to be amazing - adjust to having fewer clothes.

• Don't hold onto clothes I don't love to wear. 

• Never go out looking slummy: this includes yoga pants. Since most of my skirts have been sliced on blackberry thorns or burnt on the stove, I've been a bit of a lazy dresser. No longer!

• Get the poppies tattoo! Nothing helps update a look like some new ink, and I've been planning this one for months. I'm setting an appointment Monday.

 So, the goal is to end up something closer to this..but with more black..and more color..and more jewelry:

source

 
 

Beauty Basics

Someday, I want a vanity table..the kind dominated by a huge mirror and open enough to tuck a little stool beneath..with lots of levels and tiny drawers. But for now, I generally sit at the table or on the bed - if I sit at all - while getting ready.

Some days I don’t wear make-up, or do pretty things with my hair; other days, I eat grapefruit in my painted silk robe, looking and feeling fantastic. For me, it’s generally about attitude. The best days start early - 4:30 or 5, with a sleeping Petka and fresh coffee. On those days, I greet the world well. Late mornings leave me rushed, cutting corners where-ever possible - trying my hair back and wearing yesterdays skirt under an apron..But on good days - here are some of my favorite routines:

A Yogurt Mask: Plain, full-fat yogurt on my face for about 15 minutes does amazing things for my skin. It makes my whole face soften, brighter, fresher, and happier. Any make-up that goes on after this looks better, and whatever I don’t put on my face can be eaten with walnuts and honey. I especially like Greek yogurt, but sometimes it’s hard to find the real (full fat) type in the store.

Eyeliner: I’m addicted. And honestly, if I’m going to put anything on my face, it’ll be eyeliner. Nothing makes me feel prettier than well-done eyes. I like mine dark and big and dramatic, but not crazy or clubby. Recently I’ve been playing around a lot with the Bollywood-style - lining all around my eye and adding lots of mascara and very little shadow.

Earrings: I love huge earrings! They’re such a fun, comfortable, and out of the way (at least for me) way to look and be beautiful..I have two holes in each ear (down from five in high school) and it’s a manageable number, but full of options. And best of all, earrings won’t get covered in dirt if you’re gardening, the way rings do.

Aprons: Pretty aprons always seem to say “I’m owning this whole house-wife gig!” don’t they! I want a million. I have a couple for the house and a couple that are really tough, for gardening and throwing..sometimes I forget to wear one, but when I remember, I’m always thrilled. And my clothes stay cleaner too.. ‘Cause that’s important.

Cafe au lait: For late, desperate days, black coffee contributes to the lovely “I’m too busy for life!” feeling. But on early days I pull out my little battery powered milk frother and make something decadent either alone with grapefruit and a good magazine, with Seth on slow Saturday mornings, or with Yarrow, who prefers a steamer.

Hair

 That's right..I did it!

Black hair and bangs!! What do you think?